Mobeen Tahir

5 Simple Ingredients of an Impactful Story

Public Speaking / /

It’s my turn to speak and share a highlight from the past week. The instructor’s eyes turn to me. So do everyone else’s in the room. I’m sitting among eight couples, all expecting their first child in just a few weeks. My wife is beside me. We’re here to learn what to expect as new parents and to build a social support network. I begin… “I generally consider myself a very safe driver. But recently, I was caught being naughty.” A big laugh echoes around the room. I continue, “And so last week, I did a speed awareness training.” Another laugh. “And now, I hope to be an even safer driver for my family.” Bit over. The warm-up exercise continues as we go around the room. But later, during a breakout session, a couple approaches us to share how one of them had just gone through something similar. Someone else tells me he recently saw two camera flashes on the motorway—one on the way there and another on the way back—and was hoping they’d be lenient and count it as one offence. Another couple tells me they recently moved house because their previous one was on a busy road with fast traffic. I joke, “Who are these people who speed?”—to much amusement. A simple story sparked engaging conversations. It helped create connections because it related to experiences others had. But stories, like great recipes, have different ingredients. Given the context of this one, here are five simple ingredients that can help you connect with your audience: A personal touch I was invited to share something about my week, but even without a prompt, a personal story reveals something about you that others can relate to. And that’s what builds connection. The right portion size This was a quick, around-the-room warm-up. The unspoken rule? Keep it under 30 seconds. The right length for the right setting is crucial. The last thing you want is for your audience to wonder when you’ll stop. A dash of humour The bar for humour is usually quite low. Even a small dose tends to land well as long as it isn’t inappropriate or forced. Laughing at yourself is generally a safe bet—it makes you appear confident and likeable. A sprinkle of relevance A story should be engaging, but it must also serve a purpose. A personal anecdote can add impact even to a business presentation—so long as you establish a clear link to the topic. A well-mixed narrative arc Even a short story benefits from structure. Mine started with thinking I was a safe driver, then making a mistake that challenged that belief, followed by an action I took to correct it, and finally, a learning outcome—becoming a safer driver for my family. This tied in perfectly with the group’s focus on family and safety. A great story leaves a lasting impression and can spark unexpected connections. So next time it’s your turn to speak, share something personal—maybe even a little silly. Were you flashed by a speeding camera? Own it. You might be surprised by the positive response.

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Appearances Can Be Deceptive – Why You Must Talk to Everyone

Public Speaking / /

He shakes my hand, thanks me for an excellent presentation, and states that he will definitely invest in the product I had just pitched. My jaw is ready to hit the floor, but I restrain my surprise and excitement. Instead, I say thank you with a polite smile. It’s unusual for people to endorse your pitch so directly, but that alone isn’t why I’m so taken aback. It’s because of who this person is and what I’d been grappling with during the presentation. The event was a roundtable with six or seven people in the audience. Two people stood out. One exuded positive energy, with body language showing not just engagement but enthusiasm. The other, the one who later came to me, had a poker face. I couldn’t tell if he found my presentation interesting at all. Throughout my presentation, I was thinking that maybe my message is landing with the person showing enthusiasm and perhaps not working for the person with the stern face. I later learned the highly enthusiastic person wasn’t a serious investor—but was just there for fun. This was a powerful reminder to never fall into the trap of focusing on one person at the expense of others. As public speakers, we naturally gravitate toward friendly faces—someone smiling or laughing at our jokes—to calm our nerves. But this can come at the cost of ignoring someone with a less expressive demeanour who may be deeply engaged. Everyone expresses interest and reactions differently. To truly connect, we must speak to everyone in our audience. Here are three tips to ensure you do: Talk to people individually. Think of public speaking as a series of individual conversations. This mental trick can ease nervousness. Instead of addressing the whole crowd at once, treat it as speaking to one person at a time. Say something to one individual, finish your point, then move to the next. This way, everyone feels you’ve spoken to them personally. Make deliberate eye contact. Public speaking is the opposite of riding the London Underground, where avoiding eye contact is an unwritten rule. In a speaking setting, look directly into people’s eyes, just as you would in a one-on-one conversation. Avoid the tendency to scan the room aimlessly—connect with individuals through your gaze. Reach everyone. Don’t focus solely on one person. In small groups, it’s easy to engage everyone. For larger groups, hold individual conversations with people in different parts of the room. In very large crowds, orient yourself to different sections to simulate the feeling of personal connection. Spread your attention to include as many people as possible. When you connect with everyone, you ensure that no one feels left out—not even the person with a poker face who may become your most enthusiastic supporter. Just as I learned at that roundtable, appearances can be deceptive. Don’t let surface impressions dictate your focus. Speak to everyone, and you’ll leave a lasting, positive impression.

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What My Failed Joke Taught Me – How to Make Humour Work

Public Speaking / /

Seven people stare at me with blank expressions. I’ve just told a joke that clearly hasn’t landed. I’m at a conference where I’m delivering the same pitch multiple times in a series of roundtables with different investors. I’ve already made this joke six times, and on each of those occasions, I received an appropriate amount of amusement. But on the seventh occasion, the only two people polite enough to smile are my colleagues—who, of course, have already heard the joke six times. Now, arguably, these aren’t terrible odds. The joke worked on six occasions and failed on just one. Maybe this time my deadpan delivery didn’t translate. Or maybe they simply didn’t find it funny. But even if the joke had landed every single time, there’s a better way to deliver humour—and I’m grateful my one memorable flop taught me this lesson. What was wrong with my joke was that… it was a joke. It felt forced. It didn’t necessarily contribute to the narrative. It wasn’t a story. By contrast, delivering a humorous story—or weaving humorous moments into a broader story—tends to work far better for two reasons. First, storytelling gets the audience engaged and invested in what you’re saying, making the humour more obvious and harder to miss. Second, even if the humour doesn’t spark a laugh, the story itself can still serve its purpose by conveying an important message in an engaging way. While the thought of introducing humour in a serious presentation can feel intimidating, I believe that in the business world, the bar for success is relatively low. Audiences are often relieved to encounter a fresh, entertaining approach—especially when they’re enduring a series of presentations. If you can make an audience laugh, you’ve already won them over. And if you do it through a story, your message will stick because people remember how you made them feel. Oh, and if you do get a few blank stares now and then, that’s okay. Developing the ability to introduce humour in serious presentations will pay dividends in the long run.

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The Elephant in the Room – Why You Should Never Go Over Your Time

Public Speaking / /

I’m sitting in the conference room, waiting for my turn to speak. Everyone is focused on the speaker on stage, but my gaze drifts to the moderator, who’s started pacing beside the podium. At first, I don’t think much of it. Moments later, I glance over again, and his pacing has turned more frantic, his body language more agitated. He checks his watch. At this point, I notice others watching him too. One by one, people are pulling their attention away from the speaker and toward the moderator. A nervous energy settles in—there’s an unspoken tension, like an elephant in the room. The speaker has clearly gone beyond their allotted time. A few more minutes go by, and now it seems everyone is aware of the situation. Everyone… except the speaker. When the speaker finally wraps up, you can almost feel the moderator’s palpable relief. As a public speaker, going over your time can seriously undermine your credibility. A common reason is that people who are knowledgeable—those who’ve studied a subject deeply and have plenty to share—often feel compelled to unload everything they know. This explains the bloated slide decks, jam-packed with information, and the tendency to cram too many points into each slide. It’s practically a recipe for running overtime. Here’s a simple way to avoid this: say more with less. Reduce the number of points you include in your presentation. Ultimately, if someone asks you to articulate the main message or purpose of your talk, you should be able to state it in just a few words—or maybe 10 to 15 seconds. Once you’re clear on the “why,” you can fill your 20, 30, or 40 minutes with just the right amount of material to support that goal. Not everything you know belongs in the presentation. In fact, by sharing fewer, carefully chosen points and delivering them effectively, you’ll not only make a stronger impact on your audience, but also avoid the awkward moment of being the speaker who makes the moderator panic.  

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Our Horror on Honeymoon – The Truth About Honesty in Public Speaking

Public Speaking / /

The boat operator stops and points to the shore with excitement. My wife and I exchange curious glances—we must have reached one of the highlights of the ride. But as we follow his gesture, we nearly shriek in horror… Just moments ago, we had stepped out of a famous tourist attraction when a broker approached us, selling boat rides. Seeing Bangkok’s floating markets was high on my wife’s must-do list, and given that we were on our honeymoon, it sounded like the perfect romantic experience. So, we bought our tickets, hopped on the boat, and set off on what we expected to be a serene escapade. Then came the first stop. We had heard about vendors selling goods from boats, so we braced ourselves for a charming cultural scene. Instead, we were met with the sight of a nearly two-metre-long water monitor lizard lounging on the shore—just a few feet away from us. The romantic honeymoon vibe took an unexpected turn. As the tour continued, we encountered more water monitors, some casually swimming alarmingly close to our very low boat. It felt like a horror movie as we clung to each other, silently hoping none of these creatures would decide to hop aboard and check how our honeymoon was going. After navigating through—let’s just say, rather unpicturesque—backstreets, the boat finally dropped us inside a chaotic fish market. We grasped each other’s hands, dodging slippery puddles and the overpowering smell of seafood, just relieved to have made it out alive. Thailand remains one of our favourite destinations, and our honeymoon was delightfully memorable. But this particular experience is etched in our minds—for all the wrong reasons. Now, the person who sold us this “romantic” boat ride was, by some measure, successful. He made a sale. As a salesperson and public speaker, he convinced us. But in doing so, he left such a lasting impression that, even years later, we still question the integrity of someone who so confidently sold us a dream yet delivered a disaster. The Public Speaking Lesson As public speakers, our responsibility doesn’t end when we finish speaking. It doesn’t even end when we achieve a sale, convince an audience, or win a deal. The real test comes afterward—when people reflect, engage with our ideas, and see if our message holds up. If we mislead them, we haven’t just lost their trust; we’ve failed in our duty as communicators. I therefore suggest two principles every speaker should uphold: Be Sold on What You’re Selling As speakers, we are always selling something—a product, a service, an idea. But do we believe in our own words? Is what we’re saying actually true? If we can’t stand behind our message with conviction, we shouldn’t be delivering it. Be an Agent of Change If we can’t fully support what we’re promoting, we have two choices: either change the message or improve what we’re selling. If a product or service isn’t good enough, it’s our duty as its spokesperson to push for better. If our argument is weak, we must refine it. Integrity means taking responsibility for what we share with our audience. Public speakers are in the business of influencing others. With that influence comes a moral obligation to do right by our audience. A tactical win earned through deception will eventually backfire—on our reputation, our business, and our credibility. So, be honest. Don’t sell honeymooners a romantic swim with water monitors.

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An Intruder in Our Driveway – The Power of Personal Storytelling

Public Speaking / /

My phone vibrates. It’s a notification I don’t want to see. It has only been a couple of days since I installed a new security camera in front of our house, and now the app is alerting me to movement. The camera is smart. I’ve set a defined zone where movement should trigger a notification. Someone is inside the danger zone. An intruder? I tap the notification, and there he is—static, staring at his phone. It’s me. I’m the intruder. In that moment, I realise two things. First, silly me. I wave at myself in the camera, laughing both with and at myself. And second, while my camera is smart, it would be even better with AI-powered facial recognition. If it’s me, my wife, or my son—no need for an alert. A friendly neighbour? Maybe. But if it’s someone else, then notify me. I shared this story in a presentation about AI, illustrating how connected devices will increasingly incorporate AI—not just because manufacturers push it, but because consumers will demand it. Like I did. On-screen, I had a simple chart projecting the rise of connected devices. But I hardly mentioned it. Instead, I told a personal story. Because personal storytelling is powerful. Here’s why: It makes you human. A personal story shows your audience that you have emotions and experiences like theirs. Everyone has silly moments. Everyone has frustrations with technology. Sharing something small from your life doesn’t undermine credibility—it enhances it. People connect with honesty and authenticity. It’s uniquely yours. You can craft a great story about Henry Ford or Coco Chanel, but others have told those stories before—or at least some version of them. Someone else might even have told them better. But your own story? No one else has lived it. It’s fresh, original, and only you can tell it. It creates a ‘wow’ moment. When your personal story seamlessly bridges into your message, it grabs attention and sticks. Audiences get hooked by the story and then experience a moment of joy when they see its relevance to your key point. The best way to master this approach? Build a library of personal stories. I highly recommend Matthew Dicks’ books Storyworthy and Stories Sell, where he introduces homework for life—a daily practice of documenting storyworthy moments, no matter how small. Over time, this habit makes it easier to find connections between your experiences and the topics you speak on. Lectures are boring. Stories are better. But personal stories are powerful. So, if you want to stand out as a speaker and be memorable, dig into your life for stories. Have you ever had an intruder?

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A Lasting Footmark of Carelessness – How to Eliminate Filler Words

Public Speaking / /

As I approach the crossroads, I notice two workers patching up the road with cement after installing what appear to be new internet cables. What immediately stands out is the lack of signs warning passersby. In this part of the world, things just tend to move along. I take a large step to avoid the freshly laid cement but wonder if someone might step on it. On my way back, an hour or so later, I see a deep footprint in the cement. Someone has clearly stepped on it—most likely out of carelessness—leaving a lasting impression on the road for others to see. And not necessarily a positive one. The same thing can happen in communication. If we don’t pay close attention, we risk leaving a lasting impression on others that might harm our reputation. I recently experienced this when I tuned into a podcast interview with someone I was excited to hear. This person leads a prominent company driving one of the most important technological trends of our time. Clearly, there was much I could learn from him. But after about five minutes, I felt compelled to stop listening. The reason was simple: all I could hear were “umms,” “ahhs,” “you know,” “sort of,” “kind of,” and “like”—filler words drowning out the message. It was a painful exercise to extract meaning from the clutter. A few days later, I saw a video clip of the same person being interviewed on a major television channel. Needless to say, I didn’t press play. What a tragedy. Here is a leader changing the course of humanity with cutting-edge technology, someone much smarter and more accomplished than I am, with invaluable insights to share. Yet, his diamonds were buried too deep in the rough, and I was put off. Filler words must be eliminated! While nervousness often contributes to filler words, a more fundamental cause is speaking faster than the brain can compose coherent sentences. This mismatch leaves gaps that filler words inevitably occupy. Here are three ways to overcome this: Slow down. Give your brain more time to curate a message and deliver it to your vocal cords.   Pause. Pausing is one of the most powerful tools a speaker can use. It gives you time to articulate your thoughts and forces the audience to pay attention. A well-timed pause after a key point can emphasise your message.   Practice deliberate sentences. Try this exercise: Craft a sentence with a clear message and deliver it with force. Speak loudly. Modulate your voice. Can you hear the punctuation? Repeat this several times, and you’ll notice an immediate improvement. Filler words can hurt your credibility. Just as we might question the attentiveness of someone who steps into wet cement, audiences might question your focus if your speech is littered with unnecessary words. Pay attention to your filler words. Be vigilant. Don’t leave a lasting footmark of carelessness.

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The Megalodon Effect – Make a Jaw-Dropping Start

Public Speaking / /

“What happened to the Megalodon? The Megalodon was a giant shark that once swam in our oceans. Around 3 million years ago, the Earth’s temperature fell. The Megalodon was unable to adapt to the colder environment. Its food supply depleted, and eventually, it became extinct. Its close cousin, the great white shark—roughly a third of its size—adapted much better by relocating, something the Megalodon was unable to do. Moral of the story? You can be the most ferocious predator in the world, literally the biggest shark in the ocean, but if you are unable to adapt in the face of cataclysmic changes in the environment, you become extinct. Cataclysmic changes like the one we are faced with today: the advent of artificial intelligence.” It was Stockholm’s Grand Central Hotel, the city’s flagship venue, with a majestic event room that felt more suited to a theatrical performance than presentations on financial markets—which, incidentally, was the theme of the conference. Little did the audience know that what they were about to witness was perhaps more in keeping with the dramatic setting of the room: a touch of drama they weren’t expecting. My presentation was on investing in artificial intelligence. Upon climbing the stage, I swiftly flicked the screen from the holding slide with the presentation title to the first slide: a fierce, gigantic shark with its jaws wide open. Then, I launched into the sequence above. Later that day, I was tagged in LinkedIn posts by attendees who cited this story, perfectly grasping my point about the importance of adapting in the face of change. The story had achieved its intended goal. And there are several reasons why it left a lasting impression. Surprise Creates Engagement It was a highly unusual way for a presenter at an investment conference to begin. The element of surprise immediately got people engaged. Most presenters start by introducing themselves, stating their job title, and repeating the title of their presentation—something the moderator has often already done. This wastes the most precious first few seconds by telling the audience what they already know. Instead, it is much better to dive right in. Vivid Imagery Amplifies the Message The story was paired with a visually captivating—and perhaps even intimidating—image of a giant shark with its jaw wide open. Such slides and imagery are rare at investment conferences, which made it stand out even more. Stories Are Memorable Humans make sense of the world through stories. Yet, so often, business pitches bombard audiences with data they will never remember. Launching straight into a story grabs attention because it has a sequence of events, drama, suspense, and, most importantly, a narrative arc which helps us make sense of the world around us. If delivered with the right intensity, even a compact story like the one I shared is hard to forget.   But for this approach to work, the presenter must do two things: Keep it short. My entire presentation was meant to be twenty minutes long. As essential as the opening sequence was, it needed to be concise. A 15-minute tutorial on the Megalodon would clearly not work. Establish relevance. The story’s connection to the presentation’s main goal must be clear. This not only engages and entertains the audience but also ensures they understand your point and are eager to hear what else you have to say. How you start your presentation can make a huge difference. Be bold. Be creative. Bring out your Megalodons.

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Not Quite World Class – Never Set an Expectation

Public Speaking / /

Again, I swing with all my might. This time, after already making a few misses, my bat just about makes contact with the ball, and we scramble to take a single run. I know I’m letting my team down—this format demands that every shot sends the ball flying out of the ground. But then, it’s what the live commentator says that makes me want to dig a hole in the ground and bury myself… It’s a fast-paced, high-octane cricket tournament being played under lights, with live commentary rousing a large crowd. All the teams have given themselves interesting names—a bit of tongue-in-cheek humour is the order of the day. As captain of the team, I decide to do the same. We call ourselves World 11. This, of course, gives plenty of fodder to the commentator, who, upon watching me struggle while batting, proclaims—much to the amusement of the crowd— “World 11 aren’t quite looking like World 11 right now.” The crowd erupts. I have nowhere to hide. So, I laugh along at my plight—because that’s all I can do. This happened almost sixteen years ago, but I have never forgotten that moment. Not because of the embarrassment—I actually found it funny and have no qualms laughing at myself. I haven’t forgotten it because it taught me a very important lesson. We called ourselves World 11—supposedly a team of eleven world-class players. It was clearly a joke, but still, we set an expectation. And we disappointed. The Public Speaking Parallel In public speaking, it’s easy to make this fatal mistake. Speakers often set expectations for what they are about to say by prefacing with statements like “Let me tell you something really funny.” If the audience doesn’t find what follows truly funny, the speaker has set themselves up for failure—even if their remark was mildly amusing. Many speakers understand the importance of storytelling. But they often begin their story with something like, “Let me tell you something interesting that happened to me the other day.” Now, the audience expects an interesting story. The bar has been set. The risk? The audience may feel underwhelmed. I once watched a speaker introduce a point with, “Let me tell you a fun fact” (about the product he was pitching). The audience’s response was lukewarm. His body language drooped. Almost immediately, he backtracked: “Not really a fun fact.” Ironically, I thought what he said was quite interesting—but his framing created an expectation of something thrilling. When the audience didn’t react accordingly, the fun fact flopped. What Should You Do Instead? Go straight into your message. Just share the fun fact. Don’t preface it. The preamble serves no purpose—it only creates unnecessary pitfalls. If you’re telling a story, dive straight into the action. Immerse your audience in the moment. Don’t tell them what the story is about. Don’t tell them if it’s sad or hilarious. The element of surprise is what makes a story compelling. By framing it in advance, you take that away. Take my story above. If I had started with, “Let me tell you a hilarious story about a time I felt really embarrassed during a cricket match,” you’d already know what’s coming. You’d be expecting something hilarious, and you’d know in advance that I end up embarrassed. What follows would simply be a description, rather than an experience. Instead, I placed you directly into the moment—present tense—so you could experience it as it unfolds. The Lesson: Never Set an Expectation Avoid setting expectations. Don’t frame your most compelling narratives. Go straight in. And don’t call yourself world-class—even if you are. We did. And we weren’t even close.

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Don’t Show Me the Spare Wheel – Know Your Audience

Public Speaking / /

As my mother and I approach the car on display, the salesperson begins her demonstration by opening the boot. I think, Well, that’s an odd place to start. She then proceeds to remove the base layer of the boot to reveal the spare wheel. At this point, I am a bit confused. After a few further illustrations in and around the boot, we slowly progress towards the rest of the car. As my mother and I examine the driver’s seat and enquire about the car’s tech features, my dad emerges from the office. After exchanging a few pleasantries, the salesperson offers to show my dad the spare wheel. Luckily, my dad turns down the offer, saying that wasn’t important. Now, it is entirely possible that for some customers, the spare wheel might be the most important feature of the car. But the salesperson has not asked us what we are looking for. This was an incident that reminded me of a fundamental principle in communication and sales—one that applies equally to public speaking. We see this so often: salespeople trying to sell us something without making the effort to understand what we actually need. Most people have probably heard about the famous interview exercise in which the interviewer hands the interviewee a pen and asks them to sell it. The rookie mistake would be to immediately start highlighting the features of the pen: It writes so smoothly, it feels great in your fingers, there is a special deal on right now, and so forth. The correct response to this exercise is to ask questions instead: Are you looking for a pen? What kind of pen are you looking for? What do you intend to use it for? What’s your budget? Once the buyer’s needs have been established, the seller ought to highlight the most relevant feature of the item—be it a pen or a house. All business, at its core, boils down to this basic principle. Yet so many businesses fail to understand it. They create a product and then try to force their customers to buy it: You should buy this pen because it writes in the most beautiful shade of blue. But the customer might be looking for a black pen. Or a pencil. Or fruit and vegetables. When we take the stage and speak publicly, we are inevitably selling something. If it isn’t a direct business pitch on a product or service, we might be selling an idea. We are there to convince the audience of something. The exact same principle must apply. We must ask ourselves: What is it that my audience needs? When conversing with a single person or a small group, the task is certainly easier. One can simply ask. When presenting in front of a large audience, the same approach clearly won’t work. But the speaker must do one thing: make a mindset shift and turn their attention towards the audience. They must remember that they are there for the audience. What might the audience actually need from them? This simple switch changes the presenter’s focus from themselves to the audience. They stop fixating on what they must say and think instead about what might actually be of value to the audience. Don’t just start selling the spare wheel.

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